CLEVELAND — Jess Patz’ ex-husband abused her for years. She was a victim in her own home.
“I was a victim for almost five years and then it took almost 10 years after I left him to get my children safe,” she said.
She eventually got the courage to leave but even then, as a co-parent, the abuse continued.
“He choked me right in front of the kids. They were in between me yelling please stop,” she recalled.
She filed a report that time, but said he got off with a disorderly conduct charge.
“Having to be abused by someone who is supposed to love you is hard enough, then having to validate and prove that abuse is just like re-victimization all over again,” said Patz.
It wasn’t until her ex-husband nearly killed another woman that Patz felt she could start sharing her story and she would be believed.
“He was sentenced to 20 years in prison and I had this huge weight off of my shoulders where I could tell the truth,” she said.
She started talking, knowing someone, somewhere needed to hear her story. Now, she has more than 40,000 Facebook followers and her own organization called 'I Choose Hope.’
“We help domestic violence families in emergency situations,” she said.
She’s turned her pain into power and on Oct. 26 will host an event in downtown Cleveland starting at 6:00 at Cleveland Public Library. It’s called ‘Choosing Hope in the Land’
“I’m really proud to bring this event to the Cleveland area,” she said. “It’s about people being heard. It’s about people being less alone. It’s awareness. it’s bringing community together.”
Not only will she be sharing her story, but others, too.
Nick Pinardo will be speaking about his 18-year-old daughter, Alyssa. Alyssa was shot and killed in May in Brunswick. Her boyfriend has been charged in her death.
“I think about her every day. There’s not a day goes by that I don’t,” said Pinardo.
He said he didn’t know she was in an abusive relationship. A week after she passed, family members found a domestic violence pamphlet, exit strategy and a break-up note to her boyfriend in her backpack.
“A lot of times she was wearing a hoodie sweatshirt because she was cold, I didn’t know she was covering up bruises on her legs and bruises on her arms,” he said. “I just want to make things right now.”
He hopes by sharing her story it will help others.
Wednesday’s event will also include a candlelit walk and there will be resources like a trained therapist and employees from the Journey Center and The Cleveland Rape Crisis Center.
“When you google help for domestic violence it’s hard to navigate the internet and figure out what you should be doing and we are going to have that right there in front of people,” said Patz.
To learn more, you can follow ChoosingHopeintheLand on Instagram and Facebook or click here.
The event is free.
